At Learn2Care, we value the voices of caregivers who stay at the center of family life, juggling aging parents, growing kids, demanding jobs, and the emotional weight of being the go-to person.
We spoke with Christy Byrne Yates, M.S., a speaker, author, podcast host, and Licensed Educational Psychologist. Her work focuses on helping the Sandwich Generation. In doing so, she combines years of personal caregiving experience with her professional background in helping families move from just getting by to thriving.
Here is Christy’s story, in her own words.
“Caregiving in the middle isn’t just hard, it changes every member of a family.”
My work is about the Sandwich Generation; better put, that hard, sometimes overwhelming time when one cares for both children and aging parents. It affects everybody in the house, not just the caregiver in the middle.
And this season is growing. About 50% of caregivers under 50 are sandwiched, and almost 30% of all caregivers are caring for both generations at once.
These are hard times, but also the ones that build resilience.
Kids witness acts of kindness around them. They learn to be independent as they help in caregiving in ways suitable to their age. But again, balance is essential—children also need time to simply be kids.
What Children Learn from Watching Us
Kids are always learning, and some of their most valuable lessons come from observing the adults they look up to. We teach emotional regulation, boundaries, and self-care not by our words, but by what we model.
I often ask parents and caregivers:
What does your actual self-care routine consist of?
The questioning is not to instill guilt; rather, it is an opportunity to create healthier habits that will benefit our children, our parents, our partners, and ourselves.
The Hardest Moments: When the Middle Feels Heavy
The most challenging times in my Sandwich Generation journey have been times of juggling work and caregiving, and everything else life demanded.
I have been experiencing anticipatory grief long before I had words for it, a sense of emotional hurt because of loss while life was ongoing.
I found difficulty in showing up fully for the people who needed me if my mind carried a big and heavy load.
It’s very hard to step back when you’re in the middle of it all.
What Helped Me Find My Way
Well, in those intense years, a few things kept me steady:
When I did this, strategies became clear. I wrote them down, I revisited them, I adjusted them, and then followed my heart.
“Sandwiched parents, give yourself grace—you’re carrying a lot.”
Being in the Sandwich Generation is one of life’s hardest seasons. But it’s also full of meaning and connection, and chances to model compassion and resilience for the next generation
Being in the Sandwich Generation is one of life’s hardest seasons. But it’s also full of meaning and connection, and chances to model compassion and resilience for the next generation.
Christy helps parents, caregivers, employers, and service providers handle the pressures of dual caregiving. In books, keynote talks, trainings, and her podcast, she brings clarity and emotional insight to families navigating Alzheimer's, dementia, and multigenerational care challenges.
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